Netflix or Nothing

“You’ve got to watch the Bold Type”

“Jane is so flaky!”

“Jennifer is played by Jan from The Office!”

It is very 2020 (2021 is a remaster as far as I’m concerned) to be on a Zoom with beloved friends I haven’t met in a year and hear about the latest Netflix recommendation.

Sitting there, watching my WiFi struggle valiantly to support the video feed, my mind began to wander. My first thought was to dwell on the absurdity of our thirst for convenience that is sucking the planet dry. But that’s for another time. For this time, I focused on Netflix.

Ahh Netflix. What would lockdowns be without you? We might even be forced to read a book! I digress. It is truly astonishing to see just how much content Netflix has. Pages upon pages of shows and movies and documentaries and docu-series. Everything from Love, Death Robots to Bling to Shrek. Which brings me to my second train of thought, one I believe many of us have experienced at least once in the past year and a bit.

WHAT DO I WATCH NEXT??!!

I’ve been burned before when I chose to tune into V — a reboot of a 1983 series about aliens - and the show ended abruptly because no one could be bothered to make more episodes. Hence, every decision is a conscious foray into the unknown. Will it be a Breaking Bad that will leave me always wanting for more until the very end? Will it be a Dark, leaving me in the proverbial dark, trying desperately to fathom what the hell just happened? Or will it be consigned forever to the depths of “I’m not interested in this show” until a friend points out that it gets wayyyy better in S2?

As I scrolled through Netflix that night, I read meaningless descriptions and titles, ratings and cast lists in my quest for the next show to hold my attention for however long it took me to binge through. It is ridiculous how diminished our attention-spans have become now. Any digital marketing course worth its salt will tell you to SEND THE MESSAGE in 5 seconds or less. 5 seconds. It is precisely this inability to look at anything longer than a Reel that allows even the most base cunning(squints at QAnon) to manipulate millions. Once again, I digress.

The choice feels important yet remarkably empty. If it works, I’ll be done and dusted in a couple of weeks, a month at most. If it doesn’t, well, I’ll just take another spin of the wheel.

I remember when shows had schedules and commanded large parts of our day without remorse, forcing us to sit through the same commercials 8 times within the hour. Yet, there was substance. And urgency and excitement. What fun is it if the cliffhanger is resolved instantly? Or worse, never? One of the most hated characters of the Harry Potter series arguably got it absolutely spot on when she opined;

…progress for the sake of progress must be discouraged…

Our progress with regards to replacement of clunky old satellite TV with streaming services has provided us with countless benefits without a doubt. We can spend more time binging TV shows we will barely remember a month after the last episode. We can waste away more time we didn’t have in the first place and we can continue to methodically dismantle our planet piece by piece, in pursuit of a slightly comfortable and definitively less meaningful existence.

But what happens when it goes beyond that? Already, Netflix and Prime Video, the largest providers in India are being monitored and rebuked by the authoritarian regime of Prime Minister Modi. What happens when it turns into a propaganda machine? Do we rely on exploitative corporate behemoths to stand up to governments? How did that work out with Facebook and Twitter?

Beyond these challenges, the simple fact that the absurd variety of streaming services are increasingly looking like TV channels themselves points to a future eerily similar to TV, albeit in this case, there is no suspense, no drama and very little satisfaction.

In the memorable words of Forrest Gump;

Momma always said life was like a box of chocolates. You never know what you're gonna get.

Netflix in a nutshell.